Archive for the ‘My Mom’ Category

sad news…

dsc05670It saddens me deeply to say that my Mom passed away on October 17, 2010 at 3:20 a.m. Here we are Christmas 2009. My mom, Malia and me. This picture was actually in a draft post titled, “Great news…” Well, it’s quite the opposite to say the least. I couldn’t delete the picture so I decided to erase the draft and start over.

Actually at one time there was great news. My mom was doing great for awhile and I’m thankful for that. I haven’t been keeping up this blog like I thought I would be so it would take weeks to explain all of the details. So let’s just say that she kicked her Cancers ass and was winning the battle. But then the tumor decided to rally and came back with avengence.

My mom had a clean scan on July 1st. She had her port removed. She was feeling good. And then the problems started. I really can’t go into detail about them right now because that would be too hard on me. So after a hard summer, lots of cough medicine, antibiotics, hospital vistis, esophogeal stent and surgeries my mom is free from suffering. I’m happy that is she isn’t suffering anymore, but I am mad that she was taken too soon. I’m angry at the doctors, I’m angry at Cancer and I’m angry that I can’t call my mom anymore and hear her voice. But I’ll leave that for another post.

My mom was AMAZING throughout her battle with Lung Cancer. She didn’t complain. She didn’t feel sorry for herself. She was incredible. I would pick her up for her 2nd radiation treatment of the day and she would get up, get her jeans on, her cute little pattern socks and her red boots and say, “Let’s go.” One day I asked her why she didn’t just go in her sweats. She said, ” Just because I’m sick doesn’t mean I have to look and act sick. Who wants to see that?”

She was the strongest woman I have ever seen and will ever know. I love you mom and I hope you are free. I miss you more than I can ever say.


Let the fight begin!

Well it’s been a rough month or so. In late August a tumor was found in my mom’s neck. She had been hoarse most of the summer and had a cough. The doctor told her she had a throat infection. Then it was bronchitis. Well, it never went away. She told the doctors that she knew something wasn’t right and that’s when they finally did an ultrasound. That was a heart breaking day to say the least. We held out hope that it wasn’t what we suspected and then the birage of tests began. The diagnosis: Adenocarcinoma - stage 3b. Lung cancer. The tests and days kind of blend together now and I think I was in a state of shock and denial. My mom has lung cancer. I still can’t believe it. My mom. It couldn’t happen this close to home could it? It did. I couldn’t cry at first but when it started, I couldn’t stop. I would wake up in the middle of the night and cry and wake up in the morning a cry in the shower. I had to excuse myself while playing barbies with my daughter to cry. I’ll have to say that my mom is a real trooper through all of this. She’s scared but ready to fight. I’m ready to face the fight with her. My dad and I will see that she has the support she needs.

My mom has decided to do a clinical trial that will last about 5 weeks. It calls for radiation 2 times a day. I hope it will work fast to reduce the tumor so she will be in less pain. The last week has been constant pain for her. Once the radiation and chemo start we’ll feel like we’re doing something. The waiting between these appointments has been the roughest part (for my dad and I anyways). My mom has a pretty rough ride ahead. She can do it though. She’s ready to kick cancers ass and I’m ready to sit in her corner and root her on and wipe the sweat from her brow and tell her to keep fighting.

The treatment begins on Monday. It still seems sureal to me. Positive thoughts. I will keep posting with progress.

I love you mom!